Wilderness strips life bare. It knocks all the supports out from under us. Circumstances may scream at us - and we may scream at God - that he has brought us there to kill us. And yet, it's in the wilderness that we may hear him say, “I have carried you on eagles’ wings to bring you to myself.”
Darkness can increase disorientation. It can increase anxiety and depression. Can something similar be true spiritually? Can spiritual sundowner’s be a thing?
May I tell you a story? It’s a true story. And it shows what can happen when God sees courage in you that you do not see.
In the middle of that dark-valley time, I often found myself alone with God, crying aloud and writing passionately in my journal. During that time too, I came to identify with David, the shepherd-poet-warrior-king, in ways I had not before. For David was also ostracized by people he trusted. And he cried out in distress - and in faith.
At times, David found himself in a very dark place. When he sang, “I will fear no evil,” he confessed: “Evil is real – but God’s ever-present help is greater.”
“The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want,” sang David, the poet-king. Or in other words, “I lack nothing.” “The Lord hasn’t given us enough!” cried Joseph’s clan. We may know and love David’s words. Yet at times, it may seem that we lack a LOT. So what do we do with that?
Job expressed deep anger with God. “It is God who has wronged me!” he cried. We can learn from Job: Sometimes, intimate conversations with God are passionate and fierce.
Mini-post. It's hard to look up when you're lying prostrate. Sometimes, it seems impossible. If confusion, hurt and anger are pummeling you without mercy, you may be very tempted, when you do look up, to shake your fist.